Production Thoughts

this though is where im not sure

it could be very tempting to look at the words: balance and life and conclude that the balance there includes some sort of modern ideal about food, relationships, excretion, purpose etc as being equally balanced ‘needs’. I dont think that applies to the balance im thinking about when it comes to expression though, and i dont want to make it ‘rock n roll’ or ‘monastic’ or anything really i.e not a comparison to other perceived hardships/excesses we actually do require for ‘survival’

beyond that, i sort of chuckled looking at the “trying” part of what i wrote. I’m not a philosopher nor do i even have a lot of actual concrete knowledge behind this stuff other than my experience with addiction. I was always trying to shape my life into some sort of balance, i spent all of my energy on it tbh. It led me into some very imbalanced places personally. The question sort of remains, do we decide what the balance is? or is that just a distortion? or will someone else let us know what harmony actually is in via the exterior? Or, and my personal train of thought, do we just ‘do’?

I’ve lived a very curiosity and pleasurable knowledge driven life so far i think, and many ‘sacrifices’ have been made along the way i guess. Ive accomplished some stuff “creatively” and it means nothing. I dont truly regret any of it so far although a lot of pain to other people happens because of my decision making(or lack of?) at times. I wish i could share my experience with others in a more broad way, but i have my skillset and am p content with it.

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i somewhat facetiously posted in another thread recently about someone worrying about their art being good vs bad was the most self indulgent thing. (obviously i was wrong, because we can go so much more indulgent with ‘self’) but it still remains as a bit of an enigma for me. There is a horrifically, hilariously, and alarmingly fuzzy line between interior/exterior

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isnt “objectively” “good” art, commercial art?
when does art stop being art in the commercial sense. is it when other artists have digested it enough that a more general sense can be attained for the crowds.
nietszche (an outsider to me yes) explained that theres art, something akin to being stood precariously on the edge too close to that amazing waterfall, the existential threat tied into to the beautfil majesty creates the whole experience, like pure art. something that defies explination initially due to the jarring impact on the purveyors first time meeting with this slice of reality. so theres pure art. imitation art which is the digested art from other artists and last but not least, stripped of all its metaphysical meat is commercial art, the big time bois! the we made it! ick af ye!

thats why this sites important. we’re artists. this discussion itself is the art. a conveyance beyond what the tools we’ve seen out there that exist struggle to convey.

so to me, its not about ‘likes’ or wether you agree with it or think it has merit. more so that we recognise each other as artists. so making its a moot point. especially cosnider how we are ‘the outsiders’ and a success for us would probabky be the perverting the course of mankind with the best intentions.

also… anyone notice that netflix thing about hybrid humans animals is basically hubb hahahaha. tal,king about perverting the bigger picture haha.

i agree. its why rarely agree with the term art

but i question the word artist a lot

i think everyone is inherently problem solving

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yeh! are you an artist when ur getting pimped out by big corps to sell shit? your a creative. but who sat at home meditating, stuggling to the point of extinction to figure out a way to say “primula cheese is a good spreadable cheese” makes me feel all cold and toothpastey inside thinking that all my turmoil will be exchanged into a hoodwink ability to have ppl buy shit

i think its rly nice to think art is expression or communication or problem solving compared to trying to figure out what an artist is

we utter the same point clearly, but i dont think it really even has to be that contentious - other than we are conditioned to think art is ‘the other’ and then obviously capitalistic condition over what is valuble is built into us

its kinda difficult without falling into ego traps of being “the eye” or “they that experience X”

I like the Joanna Newsom quote
“Oh my love
Oh it was a funny little thing
To be the ones to’ve seen”

Bridges & Balloons (

if thats at all close to what you mean

it is exactly what i mean but that all only really exists is where we notice it and it fits our narrative understanding - it isn’t really real; it becomes more real every time because we want to add more context instead of believing that strange moment (i think)

this might be off tangent, I hope not…

life preserving errors are mistakes or hashed guesses of reality the mind/brain make so that we have a functioning multi-sensory collusion with reality.
‘the truth’ beyond those life preserving errors, is, I think what the artists we’re referring to are trynna get through to.
another way to explain is the brain as a computer. without the bottlenecking of our perception, billions of bits of information pass through our brains per second. consciously we only deal with them in the thousands of bits. you need to not be too cognitively aware to be able to see things in the truest form as you’d be frozen into what I think autistic ppl see in slices.
there is a term called abjection. an ego death caused by extreme external events on the perciever. basically: bad shit can happen to you that the person who you were in your head cant take it and dies off for a want a better term. apparently, im kind of certain. through that abjection you can gain momentary glances into the truth.

and considering what we know about each others lives isnt strange that conversations lead us to these crossovers.

Introduction to Julia Kristeva, Module on the Abject (

mhhmm but i would urge one to let go of the idea of ‘truth’ and instead focus on something more like honesty - something communicable and emotionally expressive

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I hear ya. not the absolute but a moving towards more honest expressions.

theres a thing in that book Im reading, about the ‘master’ was the initial person who drew this ornate scene* and that every artists who replicates that works, talent, is measured off how close to the orignal they can get.
in a world where we’re told basically artistry is to be the closest imitator.
where art to me/us, is moving away from that initial ornate scene and creating our own
yet, its not just a painted scene. its the medium of expression itself

*(humour me(seperate, but)- metaphor for the first idealised understanding of reality we share today)

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Art and Fear: Observations on the Perils (and Rewards) of Artmaking

P sure I’ve shared this book on the forum before but I’m re-reading it a third time and getting soooo much more out of it for some reason. Kind of dense writing but not a long book. I’m getting more out of it by reading just a few pages a day and reflecting.

It’s all about a lot of the stuff discussed here as of late. Can’t recommend enough, genuinely helpful for any artist in any medium. All about motivation, self doubt, audiences or the lack thereof, all kinds of stuff.

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